Fuck, Marry, Kill

date:10-25-25

A panel showing Shrapnel, a red jackal character, sitting on a ledge. Hammer, a blue dog character, stands in a pit. It takes place in a large blue chamber in a Dungeon.The second panel shows Hammer and Shrapnel looking at a green gem.Hammer says "Huh. This is the haunted gem Regi wanted us to find."Hammer and Shrapnel say in unison "Lame." The first panel shows Shrapnel placing her hand on the green gem. She states "Well, let's just get this back." The second panel shows Hammer and Shrapnel being amazed. A large green feminine figure appears in a shine of jade light. Shrapnel says "woah mama". The third panel shows the lady that came from the gem holding the classic Baphomet pose. She says "Since you two have distrubed my gem, you must play my game." The fourth panel is Hammer looking confused and going "Huh?"The fifth panel shows a close-up of the gem lady's lips stating "Fuck. Marry. Kill." The sixth panel shows a up-angled view of the gem lady with massive boobs. "But your choices need to match. If not, I will fuck, marry, then kill you both." Above a series of 3 panels "Your selection is randomly generated..." Panel 1 is Eyedro.  He is a green humanoid with a black necklace wearing jeans. He is a English Major. Love folk music.Panel 2 is Deepo. He is a yellowish mammal with a single strand of hair coming out the top of it's head. Kind and peace loving himbo. Panel 3 is Logan. He is a long red phallic creature with a smiley face. Panel 4 is Hammer and Shrapnel not amused. Panel 5 is similar to panel 4 but the look at each other. Shrapnel says "Well, we gotta fuck Logan." and Hammer replies "Agreed." Panel 6 is the gem lady looking slightly concerned and asking for clarification "Why Logan?" Panel 7 Shrapnel looks slightly annoyed and says "The Shape." Hammer is in the background saying "duh." Panel 8 is the gem lady looking away."OK, that's enough. Now, who do you marry and who do you kill?" Panel 1 is Shrapnel and Hammer holding their index fingers to their mouths while looking to the top left. They state "I would definitely marry Deepo. He seems like he'd make a good husband. Eyedro would be a pretentious loser. So, I think I'd end up killing him anyway." Panel 2 has no dialogue. the gem lady's pupil's dilate and her shoulders raise. Panel 3 is the gem lady screaming at the top of her lungs "How the hell are you two doing that?" Panel 4 is Shrapnel looking smug. "Wouldn't you like to know?" Panel 5 is gem lady being sucked into the gem. she screams "Bitch" at shrapnel. Panel 6 is her completely inside the gem. She is still mad and tells Shrapnel to "Go fuck yourself." Panel 7 Hammer and Shrapnel stand around while Shrapnel holds the green gem. Hammer asks "So. uh... How did you do that?" Panel 8 Shrapnel looks worried and states "I don't know... I'm scared..."

Bonus!

date:11-1-25